Hey guys,


So, I felt like being randomly vain hahaha...


So...here's some pics?


( Woooo. )
There ya go. =]]

PLUR and Happy new year! :D
-Micah

Take a picture and I’ll see
nothing but an anomaly
just a fleeting moment
caught on a flash drive
don't be surprised
or lower the blinds and cry
that's just the way it is
I'm the sole remaining object
too far removed
after the roof caved in
This Life is too hard
I sit alone in the backyard
it is just too easy
to be the neighborhood freak
I am the focal point
adding an uncertain element
to such a straight laced week
neighbors point and wave
acting all friendly like
when deep down inside
wishing to drive it home
on the edge of a paring knife
Walking down by the river
polluted water overflowing its banks
lost generation in the bushes
finding that behavior rather rank
nothing ever changes
fashion fades into fly by night fads
this in turn becomes fashionable
in some periodical rag
only to be swallowed up
and regurgitated
beneath track lighting and shiny chrome
where teenagers roam
now it’s back on their backs
seeping into homes
sometimes it's alright
to go it alone


mathiasthom
written 12/30/09

Yo! It's dade.

( this way )

Hey guys,


so today I decided to go get some new ink haha. I got two nautical stars on my chest.


FUCKING OWW.


the pain was kind of rediculous, seeing that my first tattoo [on the shoulder] didn't hurt much at all.


Whatever, it was worth it. :D


( Onward! )


yay :D


-micah

Hey all :) I'm on holiday in CA which was totally unplanned, and exhausting but good to catch up with family and a few friends. If you're in S. CA and can get to Irvine (OC) let me know!

Here's some pics ( Read more... )

'Depression is a sign of weakness'
old age is a sign of meekness
how I longed to face you
and make you eat those words
you calmly spat in my face
announcing to the world
my situation
with such subtle humiliation
it was not warranted or appreciated
only these eyes shot sparks
blinking back retorts
remaining calm when I wanted nothing more
than to flip this table
smash out every window
start a world war
walk out that door
He misses her,
yet he's never truly alone
while I'm shrugging off ghosts
blowing dust off the phone
belittle my name
telling me how I'm to blame
while relatives siphoned
all the generosity from me
forgetting all the times
they used me as some crutch
left me all alone
as they played the weekends away
So I stood my ground
feeling like I've some nails to pound
temples throbbing like a simpleton's stammer
this situation is quite damaged
need to put a damper on these feelings,
before I end up screaming
crucified on the inside,
Jesus...


mathiasthom
written 12/28/09

Imagine a meeting in the flesh
not as you are now,
but how you appeared back then
to the time of peer pressure
equivalent to standing on a precipice,
cracking beneath a hot, angry fissure
a time of unwanted leisure

He was there,
standing with his back to the wall
waiting to make his exit
this was not his game
already pegged as strange
objects exploding all around him
heading for a predetermined fall

Drawing lots is a fool’s game
when one already knows the eventual outcome
its easy to walk away from this
there's the door over there
with the hulking presence of authority
breathing down your neck
undressing you with coal black eyes
hoping to exploit perceived weakness

Disarming them all
with a saccharine smile
running around that corner
to an open doorway
beckoning with sunlight, wispy clouds
and the attention span
of a sugar spun child

Late December
when did it pass?
receded to the back recesses
fading in the forgotten smoke
this spell quite broken
with the frailty of despair
yet, I remembered you

mathiasthom
written 12/27/09

So my lady and I have a 12 HOUR LAYOVER IN DENVER TOMORROW the 28th !!!!!!! if there are any guys wanting to perhaps wanting to hang out and get us out of the airport for a while it would be really awesome!!!!!!!

( Sunny Christmas )

Joe, 28, NZ. No life.

( When bad boys turn good....they make preserves! )

I'm not sure this is one hundred percent accurate, being as I'm just a queer little thing and not actually a boy (or really much of a girl, to be honest), but I got some new clothes for giftmas, and decided to dress more specifically gendered than usual, (I maintain jeans and a t-shirt is pretty damn neutral) and this is what came out.

( soyeah. I talk kinda a lot, bytheway. )

Have a nice night, y'all!

Ryan. 19. Pre-T.

( Photo and my amazing friends )

Work out more; tone/bulk up.
Start taking testosterone.
Get my medications sorted out and my mental health stable.
Get started on some trade training.
Look into the process of trading in my car.

Seems like a solid plan to me.

A monster
that is what you make me out to be
A monster
that is what you think of me

Let’s pause for a while
this world is too fast
never finding a reason to smile
your 'darkness' is all an act

In a black mood
with a cloud to match
hovering over your head
some wild storm coming up fast

Don't need the calmness
centered in the eye
or another line
to follow suit

What's the matter with you?
is this another ruse?
just light the stinking fuse
an eruption long over due

Blow up, explode
shudder and gasp
grow up, implode
self awareness beyond your grasp

Say anything
then back peddle on it
there is always someone meddling
with their hands full of it

Misleading gestures
with a sign language all its own
there are no sign posts
when you're thrown into this world,
disowned

mathiasthom
written 12/24/09

I feel trapped
I am in Hell
stuck in this body
this ugly situation
should be getting better
but it has become like prison
and familiar faces have become
complete strangers to me
Am I really so different?
Walked further off the path then you
had to see the road ahead
but I might as well be dead
for all the good it didn't do

The sun is shining
on only a select few
but all I have is my poetry
I am such a tool

Now don't get upset
just talking trash
wondering how long
ill fortunes might last?
four days until another holiday
absent family will leave me alone
won't even bother to phone
never even asked me to come home
friends that mean well
are too far away
I keep on changing
this situation keeps rearranging
finding it all quite damaging
another scar for my soul
but I still have control
pushing it all away
sailing out a window
whether it is night or day
sometimes I can't even fathom
wondering why life seems completely random

The sun is shining
on only a select few
but all I have is my poetry
I am such a fool

mathiasthom
written 12/21/09

Sending out Christmas cards
containing visual bragging rights
an odd line that is an email address
a photograph of an imploded life

Somehow, feeling no connection
forty -two years to answer to
nothing is stable, or even vertical
there is no reason to respond to you

Such an in denial stranger
sharing the same last name
the same rushing blood
pounding through miles of veins

Looking for similarities
lost in a conundrum of complexities
this world is infertile and barren
impotent, vacant eyes duly staring

Already 2 years have passed
since the last forced gathering
hoping this silence will last
beyond the point of bickering or caring

The accumulating dust silently gathers
on the discarded envelope
destined for a cleansing by fire,
ashes to useless ashes


mathiasthom
written 12/21/09